• He Has Risen!

    Over the weekend, I had an experience that I just can’t explain rationally. A few weeks ago, I went on Ray Comfort’s Facebook page and he challenged atheists to read his book. I told him that I was game and sure enough, he sent me a copy. I was in the middle of debunking the crap out of it when I decided to take a break. My financial situation hasn’t been great lately and I have been thinking a great deal about that. Before I started reading Ray Comfort’s book again, I decided to pray to God for money. I mean, if God can help basketball teams, he should be able to help out too, right? Here is what happened; I picked up Comfort’s book and a ten dollar bill fell out of it. God has answered my prayers!

    I started reading the book again and all of a sudden it made so much more sense. I mean, if a painting has to have a painter, then of course a universe has to have a universe maker, right? I have lied a few times in my life and that would make me a liar. God hates liars (even though he is all loving and everything), so God must really hate me because I lied a few times in my life. God hates murders too and as an atheist activist, I am responsible for de-converting a number of believers. In a sense, I have murdered their souls. Those people are now roasting in Hell being tortured for all eternity because of me.

    Of course, I have given some money to charity in the past and so that would make me a charitable person. My wife and I have made two children together, so if we created new life; that makes us creators. We love our children, so that makes us lovers.

    Still, according to the Bible, we are all evil wicked people from birth. Ray Comfort says that the Bible is inerrant and that atheists like me have taken it out of context. Maybe he’s right. I think I felt the Holy Spirit over the weekend.

    … It might just have been the Chinese food. Sometimes it is hard to tell. Plus, someone on Reddit/Atheism also reported finding a ten dollar bill in the book that Ray Comfort sent out. So that I guess there is a logical explanation to that too. Besides, my readers are too smart to fall for this cheap April Fools stunt.

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    Category: April Fools


    Article by: Staks Rosch

    Staks Rosch is a writer for the Skeptic Ink Network & Huffington Post, and is also a freelance writer for Publishers Weekly. Currently he serves as the head of the Philadelphia Coalition of Reason and is a stay-at-home dad.