{"id":129,"date":"2012-10-29T22:07:25","date_gmt":"2012-10-30T03:07:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/?p=129"},"modified":"2012-10-29T22:51:07","modified_gmt":"2012-10-30T03:51:07","slug":"whedon-on-romney","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/2012\/10\/29\/whedon-on-romney\/","title":{"rendered":"Whedon on Romney"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>There is no one, I&#8217;m aware of, who has the intelligence, creativity, and outright chutzpa of Josh Whedon.\u00a0 I mean, the man took a failed TV show and turned into a cult following and, arguably, one of the greatest science fiction movies ever.\u00a0 He took a campy, low-budget movie (I mean, it had Rutger Hauer in it, and I respect him a lot, but he&#8217;s rarely in anything&#8230; Oscar worthy.\u00a0 Him and Bruce Campbell are kings of the B-movie.) and made it into a 7 season TV show, with one spin-off that ran for 4 seasons and several unwritten spin-0ffs and several comic book continuations.\u00a0 Oh, and he directed the third highest grossing film of all time.<\/p>\n<p>So, when he speaks&#8230; I listen.<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Whedon On Romney\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/6TiXUF9xbTo?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>Beyond all the hyperbole and silliness, everything he says is dead on.\u00a0 Sad, but true.<\/p>\n<p>OK, you heard it here first.\u00a0 These are my tips for the Zombie Apocalypse (and why do I always want to spell that <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Alpaca\">Alpaca<\/a>?)<\/p>\n<p><strong>Number 1<\/strong><br \/>\nYou&#8217;ve got a thousand strong horde of undead heading your way.\u00a0 If you reach for a shotgun, you deserve to get eaten.\u00a0 Let&#8217;s see, five rounds of buckshot&#8230; 1,000s of zombies&#8230; even an ID proponent could figure that out.<\/p>\n<p>No, you need fire-power and lots of it.\u00a0 You should be using weapons that have &#8220;mm&#8221; in their caliber and nothing less than &#8220;12&#8221; in front of the mm.\u00a0 If you are not using belt-fed full auto-weapons, then you deserve to get eaten.\u00a0 A best bet weapon is the <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Mk_47_Striker\">full-auto 40mm grenade launcher<\/a>.\u00a0 Preferably loaded with a mix of high explosive and white-phosphorus.<\/p>\n<p>Land mines are your friend.\u00a0 Who ever nails boards to a window deserves to get eaten. No, you want to surround your home with claymore anti-personnel mines.\u00a0 Preferably connected to a laser trip wire.<\/p>\n<p>Lastly, people who drive around in trucks with rebar welded over the windows deserve to be eaten.\u00a0 No, you want something that is sealed against chemical, biological, and nuclear weapons.\u00a0 Preferably diesel powered, with the aforementioned large caliber autocannon mounted on it.\u00a0 The older <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Bradley_Fighting_Vehicle\">US Bradley AFV<\/a> or the more modern <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Stryker\">Stryker<\/a> would work well.\u00a0 If you happen to live in Germany, <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Flakpanzer_Gepard\">you could probably save the world with this<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Where are you going to find fuel?\u00a0 I bet there&#8217;s lots of places that have lots and lots of diesel that the massive horde of dumb survivors haven&#8217;t found yet (and won&#8217;t think to look for).\u00a0 Hint, look for big yellow vehicles near construction sites.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Number 2<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I hear this all the time, &#8220;You&#8217;re talking about an arsenal, where am I supposed to get that kind of firepower?&#8221;\u00a0 You have a phone book right?\u00a0 Look up &#8220;<a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/United_States_Army_Reserve\">Military Reserve<\/a>&#8221; or whatever they call the reserve army in your area.\u00a0 In the US, many cities have a military reserve base.\u00a0 There, depending on the type of reserve unit, you can find all kinds of useful equipment.<\/p>\n<p>They should have light weapons,<a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/M249\"> like the M249<\/a> squad machine gun, that will serve until you get some decent weapons.\u00a0 They should also have some form of &#8220;food&#8221; (and I use the term loosely) in the form of <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/MREs\">military rations<\/a>.\u00a0 This will last you for a while, until you get more food and enough zombies removed to start farming&#8230; we&#8217;ll talk about that in a minute.<\/p>\n<p>Some of the larger cities will have larger reserves with actual combat units and you might just find the odd tank lying around.\u00a0 Now a full-on main battle tank is overkill against zombies, but you take what you can get.\u00a0 If you can find them, a 105mm shot round should clear out the zombie hordes nicely.<\/p>\n<p>If you are really lucky, then you live relatively close to military base (hopefully army or marines).\u00a0 Get a couple of other survivors and load up some AFVs with MREs, ammo, and claymores.\u00a0 If you have enough survivors, you might even load up a big military transport truck with supplies and guard it with the AFVs.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Number 3<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You need electricity.\u00a0 The modern human society is built around electricity. If you are prepared and see the Zombie Apocalypse coming, then you can do some very useful things&#8230; like downloading a state or country wide phonebook.\u00a0 Don&#8217;t worry about the total of human knowledge on the internet, if the hard disks survive, then that can all be rebuilt.\u00a0 You need to focus on immediate survival and there&#8217;s lots to look up in phones books.\u00a0 For example, &#8220;Survival Food&#8221; and you might a warehouse of food for survivalists nearby.\u00a0 There&#8217;s several million calories stored there in a form that will last from 4 to 20 years.\u00a0 Go get it&#8230; all of it.<\/p>\n<p>You can also look up &#8220;solar power panels&#8221;.\u00a0 While other survivors are living like savages, you can be king of the hill in your very own highrise building.\u00a0 Why a skyscraper?\u00a0 There&#8217;s a couple of reasons.\u00a0 First, they have a huge internal volume for the area that must be defended.\u00a0 Plus concrete walls aren&#8217;t hurt by claymores and serve to funnel the explosive force down, concentrating it for the undead.<\/p>\n<p>Second, they have lots and lots of windows.\u00a0 Why is that important?\u00a0 Well, you need food.\u00a0 What&#8217;s easier to protect 70 floors of windows or 20 acres of flat farmland?\u00a0 You and your handful of doughty survivors aren&#8217;t going to be building <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Hadrian%27s_wall\">Hadrian&#8217;s Wall<\/a> around <a href=\"http:\/\/www.king-ranch.com\/\">King Ranch<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Finally, you can hang solar panels and get all the juice you need&#8230; well, mostly.\u00a0 Throw in some <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Reverse_osmosis\">RO filters<\/a> and you and your new clan can live quite happily for a long, long time.\u00a0 Now, you&#8217;ll be limited to chickens and maybe pigs&#8230; besides, do you actually know anyone who knows how to butcher a large ungulate?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>So, there you go, my tips for the end of the world.\u00a0 If you in Central Texas (or close enough) when the end comes, look me up, I can use someone to mind the chickens.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There is no one, I&#8217;m aware of, who has the intelligence, creativity, and outright chutzpa of Josh Whedon.\u00a0 I mean,&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":27,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[44,82,18,12],"tags":[23,92,90,91],"class_list":["post-129","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-culture","category-entertainment","category-government","category-humor","tag-romney","tag-survival","tag-whedon","tag-zombies"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/129","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/27"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=129"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/129\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=129"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=129"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/skepticink.com\/smilodonsretreat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=129"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}